My family was close growing up and we took trips together throughout the years. It wasn’t until later that I discovered some of our family vacations were actually shopping trips for art.
One year, we all drove down to Santa Fe, New Mexico so my parents could find some art. Apparently, my brother and I weren’t having all this artsy-fartsy stuff being 11 and 12 years old and all.
Now, before I get into the next part of the story, you need to remember that it was the 80s when this happened so don’t get your undies in a bunch and think my parents were irresponsible arses. They weren’t and times were much different in the mid-80s.
With that being said, we found a pet store along the same strip as the art galleries so my parents took us inside to “look at the animals”.
Really, they were asking the woman running the pet store if she would babysit us we could hang out for a few hours while they go art shopping.
And she agreed!
After a few hours, my parents returned to find my brother and I both with huge rats on our shoulders. She was freaked out but I loved rats so it was cool. This was a fun trip!
Another time we went to Durango to ride the Silverton Train. It’s a super-cool coal train with open rail cars and impeccable views of Silverton. It’s Colorado at its finest.
We booked our spot on an open rail car even after being warned that we would get dirty because it’s a coal train that belches thick, black smoke during the entire trip.
Despite this warning, I hung my head out the rail car for most of the train ride! The wind in my face and the smell of the rushing water and pine trees was intoxicating! I couldn’t get enough of the amazing mountain air.
What I didn’t realize is the conductor was not joking about getting dirty.
After a two hour ride, we hopped off the train and headed back to our hotel. Me, being completely unaware of just how dirty I was, tried to avoid the stares as we walked down the street to our hotel.
“Why are they looking at me”, I wondered?
Once I got back to the room and looked at my face I knew. My parents let me walk around with coal face (I was going to write blackface but my mom was horribly offended. She’s not racist and she didn’t think I was that dirty from the coal smoke anyway.).
I, however, was mortified and decided to take a shower. I went into the bathroom, undressed and noticed the bathroom curtain was slightly open.
The bathroom window at the hotel had one of those retractable type curtain shades. Where you pull it down and it’s supposed to catch itself and stay down. Right?
No, that’s not what happened to me.
I pulled it down, let it go, and it rolled all the way up. Schooooop, ffft, ffft, ffft.
While I was standing naked. In front of the window. On the second floor.
Remember how I said I was mortified by my blackface coalface? Well, that feeling paled in comparison to how I felt when the curtain flipped up and I made eye contact with a person on the street. FML.
That trip was traumatic.